Can you cry under water?
_____
How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
_____
Why do you have to “put your two cents in”.. but it’s only a “penny for your thoughts”? Where’s that extra penny going to?
_____
Once you’re in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
_____
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
_____
What disease did cured ham actually have?
_____
How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
_____
Why is it that people say they “slept like a baby” when babies wake up like every two hours?
_____
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
_____
Why are you IN a movie, but you’re ON TV?
_____
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
_____
Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They’re going to see you naked anyway.
_____
Why is “bra” singular and “panties” plural?
_____
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
_____
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?
_____
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
_____
If the professor on Gilligan’s Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can’t he fix a hole in a boat?
_____
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They’re both dogs!
_____
If Wiley E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn’t he just buy dinner?
_____
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
_____
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
_____
Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
_____
Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
_____
Why do they call it an asteroid when it’s outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it’s in your butt?
_____
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog’s face, he gets mad at you,
but when you take him for a car ride; he sticks his head out the window?
_____
H = How are you?
E = Everything all right?
L = Like to hear from you
L = Love to see you soon
O = Oh, and don’t forget to write……
So, HELLO ………..!
