Bill and Mary are flying to Australia for a two-week vacation to celebrate their 40th anniversary. Suddenly, over the public address system, the Captain announces, “Ladies and Gentlemen, I am afraid I have some very bad news. Our engines have ceased functioning and we will attempt an emergency landing. Luckily,… Read More »Credit Card Humor

I found this pretty funny . . . A young girl asked her father if all fairy tales begin with “Once Upon A Time?” “No,” he replied. “A whole lot of them begin with ‘If elected, I promise…’”

I know, great title for a post. Here’s the deal though. Since Madison was seventh months old, she has had pooping issues. We were actually doing semi-good with it (meaning she would actually poop every 2 – 3 days). Then we started potty training, and it has completely gone downhill… Read More »Pooping

How do I live in the only state in nation who cannot figure out how to get an accurate tally of the votes in a timely matter? We are still waiting to see who won for Cook County President here. The canidates are pissed and I do not blame them.… Read More »Voting

A man staggered into a hospital with a concussion, multiple bruises, two black eyes, and a five-iron wrapped tightly around his throat. Naturally, the Doctor asked him, “What happened to you?” “Well, I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife, when at a difficult hole, we both… Read More »Golf